Venti Grande Supremo...what?

I don't drink coffee, and I certainly don't drink the foofy coffee things that people drink at Starbucks. I have to admit a slight sense of giggling hysteria over the jargon thatStarbucks coffee people (oh, wait, the proper term is barrista) force you to use -- and will apparently correct you if you misstate your order. Vente. Grande. Skinny. Half-caf. Legs. Huh? This is just coffee-code. Why can't it be a large coffee? No, you must order a Grande, and will often be snootily corrected if you attempt to buck the system.

But I discovered that Starbucks produced a brochure on "how to order" a few months ago. There's a decoder ring for how you ought to get your enormous coffee (equal to 4-6 regular coffee cups, depending on what you get) properly. One guide has the following

1. The cup (here, to go, your own)
2. Number of shots of expresso (single, double [doppio], triple, quad)
3. Ristretto, Decaf or half-caf (regular is default)
4. Size (short 8oz, tall 12oz, grande 16oz, venti 20oz)
5. Syrup
6. Type of milk (whole, skinny, half-n-half, organic, soy
7. Modifiers (wet, dry, no foam, whip, no whip)
8. Type of drink (americano, latte, cappuchino, mocha)

It's still pretty funny, even I can decipher what they are saying. The Adorable Husband loves to go in and order 'large coffee' -- and is often squinted at curiously, and asked, "d'you mean a venti drip?". Hah!