Idiocy on Parade

A substitute teacher in Florida (that bastion of clear-thinking. NOT!) has been suspended and one of the reasons is an accusation of -- get this -- wizardry.

Doing a simple magic trick to break the ice with the class he was substituting for is apparently enough reason to dismiss him. Ooh. Making a toothpick "disappear" for a room full of school kids is, apparently, verboten. Because, you know, it's...(insert ominous music here) wizardry.

Really? I mean...really? I simply cannot imagine that anyone actually said this. I can't imaging any situation in which this is something that would be taken seriously. Well, maybe in a mental institution, or the back-room of a sci-fi convention after too many Jell-o shots, but accusing a teacher of wizardry. I first thought this was the Onion, but no. It's from Land-o-Lakes, FL, Rushe Middle School. A real person actually made the complaint.

"I get a call the middle of the day from the supervisor of substitute teachers. He says, 'Jim, we have a huge issue. You can't take any more assignments. You need to come in right away,'" he said.

When Piculas went in, he learned his little magic trick cast a spell that went much farther than he'd hoped.

"I said, 'Well Pat, can you explain this to me?' 'You've been accused of wizardry,' [he said]. Wizardry?" he asked.

I can't honestly tell if the school district was seriously considering this complaint, but it was apparently mentioned. The school district has said that there are other reasons to dismiss him, which are perfectly reasonable. The fact that they actually seemed to treat this as a serious issue -- at least enough to mention it without prefacing the entire encounter with "can you believe what someone said? Really?" is what makes this so laughable. The principal actually requested that he be dismissed.