Friday, June 22, 2007

How to Hug a Baby

This arrived in my email yesterday, and I'm still chuckling. So -- for your edification: How to Hug a Baby. (Note that I have no idea whose pictures these are).

1. First, spy a baby.

2. Then, confirm that the object really is a baby by employing classic sniifing techniques. If you smell wet diapers, this is indeed a baby. Proceed.

3. You will need to flatten the baby before actually beginning the hugging process. *NOTE: the added slobber will assist in future steps by making the baby easier to manipulate.

4. The "Paw Slide" -- slide paws around baby and prepare for close up.

5. If a camera is present, you will need to execute the difficult "hug/smile/lean" maneuver to achieve the best photo quality.

My sister has a mastiff like this one -- although her beast is fawn-colored, and a bit bigger. At his last vet visit, Colonel weighed in at an astounding 209 pounds. Makes my dogs seem tiny in comparison!

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